How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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