I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
