Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm laying in your front yard are you home
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
