why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Randomize
