So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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