How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
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