my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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