i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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