everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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