we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
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