Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Randomize
