I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Randomize
