so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
