butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I have already put on my inside pants.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
