Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
The uberlube is also flammable
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
