Just mADE A PArabola og urine
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
