guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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