So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
