just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
