I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
