she was so not down for the gang bang
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I'm determined to sit on that face.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
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