Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
