Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
