I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I broke my foot jumping out of YOUR window under YOUR watch. You failed me drunk guardian. You failed.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize