If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
