Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
