I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
