I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
