letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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