She's JV to your varsity
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize