sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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