I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
