i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
