ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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