My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
