Do vagina's smell?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
