I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Randomize
