Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
