yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize