So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
