just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
