Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
