So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
