Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
