In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
it glows. i had to have it.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Randomize
