Kiss
Puke
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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