Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
It's shark week go big or go home
Randomize
