Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I'm passing your future prison.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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