i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
