okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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